it has been too long since ive writtten meaningful words. life happened. we decided to sell our house. then God decided to relocate us across the country. we traded in 5 acres of green, a church home, deep friendships, comfort, for a 1300 square foot apartment in colorado. it all started with a simple "yes" in a simple prayer from a simple girl. before i made real friends. before i called ohio home. before i knew the "yes" would mean something so drastic and devastating to this heart of mine. but heres the good news... if i could change that prayer? i wouldn't. because a.w. tozer's quote rings ever so true in my life, "outside the will of God, theres nothing i want. inside the will of God theres nothing i fear." so here we are... churchless. friendless. houseless. inside the will of God. fearless.
lets talk a little about what my life looked like in ohio versus now. BUSY. i had my hands in everything. i babysat full time. was involved in several ministries at our church. discipleship training. bible study fellowship. guitar lessons. tae kwon do for the oldest boy. swim, for the youngest. going, going, going.... all. of. the. time. oh, and four hours of mowing every week. here in colorado, i have absolutely no obligations. and going to the pool every day is phenomenal. yesterday, was the first day of school for my oldest. we had donuts and dropped him off. worked out. took the dog to the dog park. i vacuumed and mopped all the floors. then took my youngest to a nearby park that was hosting a free event. had lunch. picked up my oldest from school then spent the next few hours at the pool before dinner and showers. i know what youre thinking. youd choose the latter life in a heartbeat. i would too. for a few days. that's how long its taken me to be BORED OUT OF MY MIND. because, as it turns out, i am the Martha. the doer. busy. and i don't know how to be anything else.
so i prayed this morning another simple prayer. theyre never very complicated, lets be honest. because as much as i love words, i have figured out that with me and Jesus? straightforward simplicity is the way to go. i asked God, "what is this season supposed to look like?" after some meditation and contemplation, i have a few ideas...
enjoying time with rhys before he starts school next year. i was able to do it with my oldest. now its his turn. and ive spent the last 4 years of his life babysitting other kids. so now, he gets my attention.
in ohio, i had tons of people pouring into me. i learned who i was in Christ. stepped into who i was as a person. i made friendships most people dream of. ill be honest in saying, i don't think this season will produce friendships like those. that's not me being pessimistic. its me being real. and that's ok for me. ive met my people. and im not saying that there will not be more in the future. i just don't think it will be now. i truly believe that this season i am meant to pray. a ton. and go out and seek the lost. because they need people. i have been surrounded by Christians the last four years, rarely coming across an unbeliever. which was good for me. i needed that. but now, i get to be that for someone else. and i will actually have the time to be just that. we will find a church. we will have support. but lets be clear and direct. the broken, messy world? theyre not knocking on our doors. so we go to them. we meet them in parks or the library. we sit across from them drinking coffee and listening. we schedule play dates and dinners. we accept their invitations and we extend ours. we love. because God loved us. its not a new message. its simple. but its hard. so hard that sometimes it takes you across the country to implement it.
so that's sort of it. nothing too profound. sorry if youre disappointed. but the Bible says theres nothing new under the sun. its true.
